Pregnancy Brain

So, you don't know what pregnancy brain is? Well, it's a phenomenon that takes place when an otherwise intelligent and rational woman becomes pregnant and then loses all ability to think rationally, listen to others, or remember anything, even if it happened an hour ago. Also includes wandering off into la-la land several times an hour. See examples below:

* Two weeks ago, Chris and I were driving by the mall. We saw a sign: BLACKBERRYS-(xxx)xxx-xxxx. That's all it said (and yes, with the "Y"). Chris looked at me and said, "Need any blackberries?" To which I replied, "Why would anyone call a phone number for blackberries? Why wouldn't you just go to the grocery and buy them? That must be some pretty special fruit." He very calmly said, "Honey, I think they mean phones, not fruit." Yeah, I felt pretty stupid. HERE'S the kicker: About 5 days later, we were driving home and saw the same sign in a different location. And what did I say?? "Why would anyone call a phone number for blackberries? Wouldn't you just go to the grocery and buy them? That must be some pretty special fruit..." I'm pretty sure Chris was speechless by this point.

* Last week I went to Target and bought some things which included a box of my favorite candy Mike & Ike. I got out of the store and a few miles down the road and decided to eat some candy. I took out the box, opened it and shoved a handful into my mouth...and then promptly spit them back into my hand. I picked up the box...Tropical Typhoon Mike & Ike. What the hell?!? That's not what I bought!! I took out the receipt and read it...as if someone had sneakily switched my original Mike & Ike with these nasty tropical ones. Nope, I sure did buy the tropical ones! I then take a closer look at the box...for those of you who don't know, the original Mike & Ike box is like neon green. The Tropical Typhoon box is...are you ready? PINK. Yes, pink. Now, this box was GIANT. How did I mistake a GIANT PINK BOX for a neon green one? Who the hell knows...

* The day after the Mike & Ike incident, I made Chris stop on our way back to work from lunch to get me the REGULAR Mike & Ike. He asked me to get him a can of cashews while I was in Walgreen's. I went to the candy row and got my NEON GREEN box of candy and headed to the endcap where the cashews ALWAYS are. They were there. They had "Fancy Cashews" and "Lightly Salted Cashews." I got the lightly salted ones because they have less salt than those there fancy ones. I paid and went to the car. We drove away. I handed Chris his cashews. And this is the conversation that followed:

C: Were they out of cashews?
Me: No, they're in your hand. (while rolling my eyes)
C: These are mixed nuts. It's not a big deal, just wondering if there was a reason you got these instead of just cashews.
Me: I didn't buy mixed nuts, I bought cashews.
C: No, you bought mixed nuts. Really, it's not a big deal. Look at the can.
Me: NO, I BOUGHT CASHEWS. (while frantically looking for the receipt as if someone had sneakily switched my merchandise TWO days in a row)
C: Are you really looking for the receipt?? Look at the damn can!! They're mixed nuts!
Me: But I bought cashews...
C: Fine. You bought cashews...but these are mixed nuts.

* I can't tell you the amount of times in a day that I have to ask people what they just said...simply because I've wandered off to a far away place and have stopped listening. I know it's rude. I know. But I just can't help it! And I normally do this to my very understanding, sweet, patient husband. I don't know how he deals with me on a daily basis.

All I can say at this point is that hopefully my normal rational mind returns once Jayna is born. Even if only half returns I'll be happy because this is just craziness...